Oh Bachelor!

"6,000 bucks per month for this. Does this suit you?" asked Hameed.

It was the third day on a row I have been roaming around the Nerul area with Hameed, a broker, in search of an apartment. I found that room to be decent enough, and did not hesitate to tell, "Yes, absolutely! let's finalize this".

Hameed, enthralled to spot me as a possible source of income for himself, said, "Ok, then let's have a quick chat with the secretary of the (housing) society. We will close the deal then and there."

After the initial introduction, the secretary bombarded me with a host of queries, "Where does your family stay? How many members will be staying here? Are you married?"

The last question was nothing new for me. For the last two days, I have been hearing that from several secretaries and watchmen, and on answering that negatively, I was shown the exit gate. This time too was I was sure of the repeat scene taking place. All I had to say was "No", and the rest was the same. That apartment was also out of my reach despite of agreeing to pay as high as Rs. 6,000 per month. I stared at Hameed who was speechless. He too was in a way cursing all those people who were allergic to bachelors, specially because that was affecting his revenue stream.

Anyways, Hameed later showed me a piece of paper showcasing a chargesheet from the Belapur Police Station in the name of a guy, who was a bachelor. He was put behind the bars. "Once Mr. Gupta, his next door neighbour, complained of loud music coming out of this guy's room. He was warned thrice. Two weeks later, the watchman saw him with a girl. And that night, he was celebrating his birthday again playing loud music and shouting on the top of his voice. This time the secretary called the police. You know, I helped him get his apartment. He seemed to be a nice person. Who would know he is like this? Now, I have to find a way to get him out."

My initial rage against the anti-bachelor class somehow cooled, and I thought "there can not be smoke without fire." The suspicious housing society secretaries and watchmen were perfectly okay as far as their positions were concerned. But the moot point is "Do all bachelors represent the same meaning and characteristics?"

A bachelor, according to me, is a somewhat distorted 'species', in our so-called 'civilized, educated and westernized' society, which is often characterized by a gamut of negative adjectives- Impractical, Unorganized, Ill-behaved, Unreliable, Careless.....the list is endless. Who better than a bachelor (which I am at this point in time) can empathize with this group that is every now and then being tagged as 'Irresponsible'. No offence against anyone, these views have developed out of my experience; neither I am supporting the bachelor class nor am I being harsh towards the anti-bachelor group. What I am attempting is to put forth some of the myths that often present bachelors in wrong shades, which might again have trigerred from some isolated, irregular events engaging bachelors.

Our orthodox culture generally considers bachelors to be useless simply because they have not been able to settle down (marry and own a family) in their lives. Marriage is considered to be an auspicious happening especially in most of the communities marking the start of a new and improved life. Bachelors, yet to experience such lives, are looked down as irresponsible under the impression that they are not vowing to take up anyone's (life partner's) charge. This, in turn, renders them illogical and careless. Frustration, according to many, forms a key part of any bachelor's life. It is assumed that an inner deep-rooted negative feeling of not finding a life partner often leads to this frustration.

'Hard' drinks, cigarettes, drugs and bachelors are considered to be the best of friends. No matter what, some people easily relate a bachelor to any of these elements, often mistaken as their stress relievers. Some are of the notion that a bachelor is very much unreliable and ill-behaved as they do not have any idea of respecting themselves and caring for others.

I have many of my bachelor friends (several of them are not well educated or even employed) who regularly participate in philantrophic activities, take keen interest in reforming the society, help a blind person cross a traffic bound road and even leave seat for the elderly in a crowded bus- Are they being careless, ill-behaved, unreliable or irresponsible?? Is anyone suspecting a bachelor to be frustrated or unwilling to take up someone's responsibility considering his current problems, family background or scenario? Are all the bars and pubs infested only by bachelors? There are lots of such questions to be answered and scenarios to be analyzed by such people who blindly can't stand bachelors. It is totally unfair to judge someone based on a tarnished image.

All said and done, however, we have 'Eligible' bachelors too, who are the most desirable candidates for tying knots. Earning big bucks and claiming fame, they represent the creamy layer of this species, always wooing the opposite sex.

Bachelorhood symbolizes independence and flamboyance. It is all about being natural, confident and assertive in thoughts. And we are at our best only when we are natural.